Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
