you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
