Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
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