he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
he was CRYING into my vagina
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize