At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
