I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
You did what with his pubic hair?
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
