Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
