420 ftw
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
