And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
