How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
are you so shy because you have an std?
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
