His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
