Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Randomize
