So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Acid is not a monday night drug
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
