from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
