you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Randomize
