I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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