He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I'm experimenting with sincerity
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
