I don't think brook has ever known best
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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