i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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