i just google imaged poop.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
