What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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