spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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