I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
