I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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