I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize