i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
