What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
