Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize