i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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