Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
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