So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
