I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
