we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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