I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
