4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
