my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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