All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
