2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
