The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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