Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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