oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
