yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
wrigley field is MILF paradise
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
