Where is the hickey?
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
