my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
