Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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