well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
