I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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