I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
