Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize