Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
