You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I fill condoms, not promises.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Life without a bra equals bliss.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
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