Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
He told me they were just razor bumps!
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Randomize
